when my world stopped before i did

I was dead tired when I arrived home.  My wife welcomed me but I brushed her aside.  I asked how the children were and without waiting for an answer, I headed to our bedroom.  I just kicked off my shoes, removed my tie and threw it at the bedside table.  Then I immediately dozed off.

In the middle of the night, I was roused from sleep.  I dreamt I was rushing home from the office and I was being followed by a cab.  As I went down from my car, one male person boxed me in the face.  I hit him in the gut and gave him an uppercut.  Another person was shouting; then I felt the nozzle of a pistol directed at my temple.  I was breathing heavily and was sweating profusely when I woke up.

I went to the kitchen and drank cold water from the fridge.

When I went back to bed, my wife was still fast asleep.  I pulled my pants and took off my long sleeves.  I then lit the lampshade by my bedside.   I opened a file folder from by backpack and began to read.

Suddenly, I noticed my wife shuddering.

I laid the file folder at the bedside table and crawled to where my wife lay.  I hugged her and I kissed the back of her head.

I heard her mumbling.

She spoke my name in her sleep.

There was sadness in her soft, lovely voice when she said: “Bakit ang hirap mong mahalin?”

I felt numb.

I drew her closer to me.

I began to feel her pain.

It was real.

And I began to sob in disbelief.

Posted by taribong on February 22, 2012

http://taribong.wordpress.com/2012/02/22/when-my-world-stopped-before-i-did/